21 “You have heard that it was said to the people long ago, ‘Do not murder, and anyone who murders will be subject to judgment.’ 22 But I tell you that anyone who is angry with his brother will be subject to judgment. Again, anyone who says to his brother, ‘Raca,’ is answerable to the Sanhedrin. But anyone who says, ‘You fool!’ will be in danger of the fire of hell.
23 “Therefore, if you are offering your gift at the altar and there remember that your brother has something against you, 24 leave your gift there in front of the altar. First go and be reconciled to your brother; then come and offer your gift.
25 “Settle matters quickly with your adversary who is taking you to court. Do it while you are still with him on the way, or he may hand you over to the judge, and the judge may hand you over to the officer, and you may be thrown into prison. 26 I tell you the truth, you will not get out until you have paid the last penny.”
—The words of Jesus from Matthew 5:21-26
“How does a believer handle a situation where he or she has become an adversary of another brother or sister in Christ?” Mostly we ignore this question. It’s just too painful, or too embarrassing, or too annoying. And, most of us think this question doesn’t really apply to us.
But, hold on for a moment. Think about the span of your own life. How many enemies do you have?
“Now wait just a minute,” you may respond. “I don’t have any enemies! I get along with everybody!”
If you really believe that, you’re just kidding yourself. Everybody has enemies.
Oh, I will grant you that you may not choose to use a term as harsh as “enemy.” But, over the course of your life as a Christian, you have certainly had run-ins with particular other Christians. You may describe your relationship with them in terms like, “I don’t really get along with ______________.” Or, you may say, “____________ does things I don’t particularly like, so I avoid (him or her).”
No matter how genteel your language, let’s face it, you have enemies. And, if you don’t acknowledge that you have enemies, I imagine that out there in the Christian world there exist some people who think of you as their enemy.
No longer can the body of believers—the church—ignore the fact that virtually every person who claims to belong to Jesus has at least one person that he or she can label as an “enemy.” Instead, it’s time to choose to become obedient to what Jesus has instructed His followers to do when they find themselves at odds with fellow Christians.
In the Scripture passage at the beginning of this blog post, Jesus tells His disciples—in that marvelous passage we call “The Sermon on the Mount”—to always work toward reconciliation. Let me state that again, so you have no chance of misunderstanding my point. Jesus expects His followers to always work toward reconciliation.
Right now, I am sitting on the sidelines watching the church I have attended for ten years destroy itself. I won’t presume to waste your time with a long recitation of what’s going on. Because I know that somewhere, in the sphere of your own world at one time or another, you are having—or have had—to deal with the similar issues in your life. Let me simply say that a significant church split looms on the horizon. Only one process can turn the tide: complete and absolute obedience to the instruction of Jesus to reconcile.
Now, most naturally, I have my own very strong opinion on what has brought about the conditions that have led to this soon-to-occur disaster. And, I take no comfort in the fact that, repeatedly over the last three years, I have issued warnings of what would happen if no one took early and decisive action. Nevertheless, the solution today remains: obedient reconciliation.
To effect reconciliation, both parties will have to come humbly to the foot of the cross and lay every issue at Jesus’ feet. Individuals will have to acknowledge and confess their sins, ask for forgiveness, provide restitution, and begin the process of reconciliation.
Will it happen? Frankly, I don’t know. Looking at the track record across the horizon of God’s people in most churches today, I would say that the chance for reconciliation seems slim. Fortunately, God remains the “God of the Great Surprise.” He has the power, through the intervention of the Holy Spirit, to bring about reconciliation. He, and He alone, can melt hardened hearts. He can convict of sin and promote forgiveness. He can move those who have sinned to make restitution. He can bring about reconciliation.
A very significant reason for church discipline is to promote reconciliation. That’s right. Church and denominational judicial processes do not exist to punish. To the contrary, they exist to bring parties together, expose all the hidden facts in a situation, help identify where some may have committed sins, and provide a structured forum for confession, forgiveness, restitution, and reconciliation. In the situation at the church I attend, a judicial process moves toward that end.
But, truthfully, it remains far better to head off such sinful disagreements by following the process that Jesus outlines in Matthew 18:15-17. I have recently written about that process and you may click here if you wish to read that particular blog post. Similarly, if you serve in a leadership role in your church and you face conflict, I have shared some key steps that you may read by clicking here.
So, what about you? Do you have someone in your life with whom you need to begin the process of reconciliation? If so, please, do so. You will reap tremendous benefit in your own spiritual life if you do. And, most importantly, God will make it clear to you how very pleased He is with what you have chosen to do.
Just one more time: Jesus expects His followers to always work toward reconciliation.
Will you pray with me?
Thank You, God, for loving us. Thank You for sending Jesus to be our Savior. Thank You for teaching us through your Word how you expect us to live our lives of obedience before You. We implore You to help us, by the power of Your Holy Spirit, to become reconciled with all those with whom we have disagreement. Give us the humility we need to bow before You and draw on Your grace. We pray all these things in the magnificent Name of Jesus our Lord. Amen.
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