9 Love must be sincere. Hate what is evil; cling to what is good. 10 Be devoted to one another in brotherly love. Honor one another above yourselves.
11 Never be lacking in zeal, but keep your spiritual fervor, serving the Lord. 12 Be joyful in hope, patient in affliction, faithful in prayer. 13 Share with God’s people who are in need. Practice hospitality.14 Bless those who persecute you; bless and do not curse. 15 Rejoice with those who rejoice; mourn with those who mourn. 16 Live in harmony with one another. Do not be proud, but be willing to associate with people of low position. Do not be conceited.
17 Do not repay anyone evil for evil. Be careful to do what is right in the eyes of everybody. 18 If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone. 19 Do not take revenge, my friends, but leave room for God’s wrath, for it is written: “It is mine to avenge; I will repay,” says the Lord. 20 On the contrary:
“If your enemy is hungry, feed him;
if he is thirsty, give him something to drink.
In doing this, you will heap burning coals on his head.”21 Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good.
—The words of the Apostle Paul from Romans 12:9-21
“I have to be careful where I sit in church these days,” the respected church member told his friend. “Otherwise, I might end up sitting next to someone I’d rather spit on than ‘pass the peace’ to.”
“Are you visiting today?” the usher asked the long time member, as she entered the church for the first time in a long time.
“You’re a spy!” the parishoner sputtered when he turned around and saw who was sitting behind him in church.
No, these exchanges do not come from the script of the latest reality soap opera, When Church Goes Terribly Wrong. Sadly, they all come from first-hand (first sources) separate reports I have received by telephone from tearful friends at a nearby church.
The actions of the leadership toward a long-time staff member, spurred on by a relatively new pastor determined to “clean house no matter what the cost,” has caused a tragic division. People, who once labored together with smiling faces and warm hearts, now snarl at each other across an ever-widening divide of distrust and seeming hatred-tinged anger. A once-proud congregation has begun dropping into a wallow of ineffectiveness and shame. A church, known in the past for exquisite and highly-engaging discipleship through its world-class music program, has begun falling into confusion and disarray.
As I considered the many implications of this heartbreaking state of affairs, I remembered that my dear friend, Fr. Eric A. Kouns, has written about the Kingdom of God in his most recent blogs. (You may click here to read what he has written in its entirety.) He states, in part:
While the New Testament does not contain a constitution or a set of bylaws for the way Kingdom citizens should live, it is not difficult to surmise such a pattern for behavior. Kingdom citizens should emulate the character of the King. The cultivation and development of Christlike character traits is called spiritual formation, and it is the most important work in which the church can be involved. It includes public worship, personal devotion, and self-sacrificing service. And it takes a church, the community of the King, to be the context, the fertile environment, in which spiritual formation can flourish.The truth about the Kingdom of God can resolve all manner of church conflicts—simply follow the course that most consistently models the values of the Kingdom and the character of the King. It can provide guidance in political issues and matters of public policy—support the candidates and policies which are most likely to produce a society which reflects Kingdom values.
Kingdom values breed Kingdom obedience. Kingdom obedience breeds Kingdom behavior. So, what does the Bible have to say about the way brothers and sisters in Christ should treat each other—not just at times of disagreement and division, but—at all times?
In the Scripture passage at the beginning of this blog post, the Apostle Paul gives firm instruction to the believers gathered in the newly formed church at Rome. He tells them to mark their behavior by the boundaries of love. He tells them to speak blessings, not cursings. He urges them to live in harmony.
“But, you don’t understand!” you insist. “You don’t know how scornfully they’ve treated me. Their lying words have damaged my reputation. They’ve nearly destroyed me by their innuendo and false accusations. They have harmed my family. They have villified my friends.”
Oh, but I do understand. Believe me, I understand your pain. I know what it is to have a new pastor come to a church and utterly destroy an important part of my life and my ministry by pushing me out of my full-time volunteer position, even though I did absolutely nothing to merit such treatment. I’ve experienced the distress of watching every policy I so carefully developed, every management practice I put in place, every effort I made to develop a culture of excellence all fall into complete disarray. It’s as if the five and a half years I invested in bringing order out of chaos was all for nothing.
I’ve experienced the sting of people I had respect for turning on me and openly displaying how much they now despise me. I feel the wrenching chest pains that come from the unbelieveably extreme stress of trying to maintain a strong witness for Christ in the face of a host of demeaning actions on the part of church leaders who seem to have no sensitivity as to what the Bible says about their responsibilities and their decisions.
In spite of all that I’ve experienced in my life—and those experiences could produce intensely negative feellings in me, if I would allow it—I have also learned that my Savior requires more of me. He requires my obedience. He has set the example of how to behave. He handled far more severe disrespect and despiteful treatment than I will ever experience. Yet, He never stopped loving those He came to save.
So when the Apostle Paul tells me to “Be devoted to one another in brotherly love. Honor one another above yourselves...Be joyful in hope, patient in affliction, faithful in prayer...Bless those who persecute you; bless and do not curse...Live in harmony with one another..” I have my marching orders. And, so do you.
Will you pray with me?
Thank You, God, for loving us. Thank You for sending Your Son, the Lord Jesus Christ, to be our Savior. Thank you for giving us Your Holy Spirit to dwell within us. We invite Your Holy Spirit to melt our hardened hearts. No matter how those who despise us may treat us, we plead with You to help us respond in love. Grant to us the ability to love those who hate us. Even as we hold unswervingly to the truth of Your Word, help us to respond with gentleness and kindness to those who would rather spit on us than shake our hands.
We humbly submit to Your will for our lives. And, for this church whose leaders have placed it in such peril, we pray for Your divine intervention. Sweep over this congregation with a powerful spiritual wind of revival. Be pleased to work out Your perfect will for this church, and for every church that finds itself divided.
Thank You for hearing our prayers, as we talk with You in and through the tenderly obedient Name of Jesus Christ our Savior and Lord. Amen.
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