When to say, “No!”

Everyone much prefers someone who always says, “Yes.”

But, let’s face it. Every person reaches a point in his or her life where saying “Yes” becomes too difficult. That point usually occurs when your emotional bank account nears empty.

Part of you wants to “go along to get along.” Part of you wants to “accentuate the positive.” Part of you wants to have others perceive you as a pleasant, helpful, supportive person. But, then there’s that other part of you; the part that has had enough, has suffered enough; has reached the end of the line. One more “yes” will put you over the edge.

Knowing when to say “No” has great importance. The Lord Jesus Christ condemned those who always punctuated their promises with an “I swear I will.” In Matthew 5:33-37 he instructed his disciples to “Simply let your ‘Yes’ be ‘Yes,’ and your ‘No,’ ‘No’; anything beyond this comes from the evil one” (verse 37).

One way of saying “No” comes to light when you stop trying so hard to convince someone you are right and he or she is wrong. Sometimes, you just need to walk away and allow him or her to exist in the reality he or she has created.

A colleague at the insurance company where I used to work often quoted two sayings which he felt offered words to live by:

1. Never try to teach a pig to sing. It wastes your time and annoys the pig.

2. Never wrestle with a pig. You get your clothes all dirty and the pig loves it.

So, give yourself permission to say “No.” Not every time and not all the time. But, when you have reached the point where those around you have fully withdrawn all they can from your emotional bank account, curl up in a comfortable place and put Jesus’ instructions to work. When the Holy Spirit refreshes you, make certain your ‘yes’ means ‘yes.’ Until then, let your ‘no’ be ‘no.’

I assure you that God—the One Who Loves You Most—understands. After all, He made you and He sent His only Son to die for you on the cross.

_{Copyright © 2009 by Dean K. Wilson. All Rights Reserved.}