Monday, August 25, 2014

Leadership of a Church and
Secret Meetings

 

[Drawing of a door with a sign]


“I appeal to you, brothers and sisters, in the name of our
Lord Jesus Christ, that all of you agree with one another…”
—1 Corinthians 1:10a

I will be quite frank. I don’t like secret meetings of church leaders. I believe they violate the intent of Scripture. I think they spawn division. I think they engender distrust. I think they are unnecessary and lead to problems.

I feel this way because I have observed over my 46 years since coming of age that whenever church leaders meet in secret, no good comes out of such meetings. Rather, I believe God’s Word teaches us to be open and transparent with one another. If we are all truly brothers and sisters bonded in the love bond of Jesus Christ, then we should always be able to speak freely with each other, no matter how difficult a situation might seem.

The Apostle Paul wrote these words to the very troubled church in Corinth in 1 Corinthians 1:10-31:

I appeal to you, brothers and sisters, in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ, that all of you agree with one another in what you say and that there be no divisions among you, but that you be perfectly united in mind and thought.

My brothers and sisters, some from Chloe’s household have informed me that there are quarrels among you. What I mean is this: One of you says, “I follow Paul”; another, “I follow Apollos”; another, “I follow Cephas”; still another, “I follow Christ.”

Is Christ divided? Was Paul crucified for you? Were you baptized in the name of Paul? I thank God that I did not baptize any of you except Crispus and Gaius, so no one can say that you were baptized in my name. (Yes, I also baptized the household of Stephanas; beyond that, I don’t remember if I baptized anyone else.)

For Christ did not send me to baptize, but to preach the gospel—not with wisdom and eloquence, lest the cross of Christ be emptied of its power.

For the message of the cross is foolishness to those who are perishing, but to us who are being saved it is the power of God. For it is written:
“I will destroy the wisdom of the wise;
     the intelligence of the intelligent I will frustrate.”
Where is the wise person? Where is the teacher of the law? Where is the philosopher of this age? Has not God made foolish the wisdom of the world?

For since in the wisdom of God the world through its wisdom did not know him, God was pleased through the foolishness of what was preached to save those who believe. Jews demand signs and Greeks look for wisdom, but we preach Christ crucified: a stumbling block to Jews and foolishness to Gentiles, but to those whom God has called, both Jews and Greeks, Christ the power of God and the wisdom of God. For the foolishness of God is wiser than human wisdom, and the weakness of God is stronger than human strength.

Brothers and sisters, think of what you were when you were called. Not many of you were wise by human standards; not many were influential; not many were of noble birth.

But God chose the foolish things of the world to shame the wise; God chose the weak things of the world to shame the strong. God chose the lowly things of this world and the despised things—and the things that are not—to nullify the things that are, so that no one may boast before him.

It is because of him that you are in Christ Jesus, who has become for us wisdom from God—that is, our righteousness, holiness and redemption. Therefore, as it is written: “Let the one who boasts boast in the Lord.”

 

I am not alone in my belief that the leadership of a church should not meet in secret. Rev. Dr. Jim Meyer, a noted expert in church management—who earned a Bachelor of Arts Degree from Biola University, a Mastes of Divinity degree from Talbot School of Theology, and a Doctor of Ministry degree from Fuller Theological Seminary with a focus specializing in church conflict— has written the following in his widely read blog: 1

Let me make five observations about secret meetings in churches:

First, secret meetings are not found anywhere in the NT.

Secret meetings are spiritually dysfunctional… relationally damaging… highly political… and psychologically unhealthy. The secrecy itself says far more about group members than it does about anyone the group is focused on.

Peter Steinke, in his brilliant book Healthy Congregations: A Systems Approach, 2 states: “When we are anxious… we are imprecise, vague, covert, less transparent. We operate in darkness. Secrecy is a deadly virus. Undetected, it can do untold damage, lasting for years. How can a congregation be a healthy community if it lives in darkness, keeps skeletons in the closet, and allows destructive disease processes to continue?”

Second, secret meetings are an unbiblical way to handle people’s grievances.

If someone was upset with me or my wife personally—according to Jesus’ words in Matthew 18:15they should have spoken with us directly, not about us to others. If they didn’t like the answer they received from us, they could have proceeded to bring in witnesses as Jesus specifies in Matthew 18:16. And if they were still unhappy about our personal conduct, they could have used the process Paul specified for correcting pastors in 1 Timothy 5:19-21.

But how was listing my faults and sharing them with board members going to help me to become a better person and pastor?

If someone was upset about a church policy—like changes in the worship service—they could have spoken with any board member because we had all agreed on the changes together. If they didn’t like the answer they received from a board member, they had two options: stay and submit to church leadership, or leave the church peacefully. A secret meeting was not going to resolve any of their concerns.

But when people pool their grievances, they automatically become divisive. Joe is upset with the pastor for Offense A… and now Madge is upset with the pastor for Offense A as well. She takes Joe’s side… carries his offense… adds a few of her own… and the whole group falls right into the trap that one author calls The Bait of Satan.

Division in a church begins when people begin to pool their grievances.

Third, secret meetings tend to overfocus on one personusually the pastor.

These meetings are specifically arranged to find a scapegoat for the unresolved anxiety experienced by some group members. “We’re feeling uncomfortable right now, so let’s blame how we feel on the pastor —and if we can make a case against him, we’ll all feel ecstatic very soon.”

But the church would have been in far better shape spiritually if those who had met to hypercriticize their pastor met instead to confess their sins… read Scripture together… pray for church leaders… and engage in a service project for somebody else. But for some reason, they never found the time to do that.

Fourth, secret meetings reveal the immaturity of participants.

Let me quote Peter Steinke once again: “Secret meetings are not arranged for the welfare of the whole community, nor are they dialogical in nature…. Secrets support immaturity. Underground murmurers in a community are usually insecure, dependent, and childish people.”

Why is this? Because participants in secret meetings do not feel strong enough to share how they feel with their pastor or leaders. They only feel strong when they meet with fellow malcontents. But when they do, nobody will challenge them… nobody will disagree with them… and nobody will love them into health. And when they finally leave the room clinging to a list of somebody else’s faults, they are silently confessing that they don’t know anything about grace or redemption.

Rather than becoming angry with people who resort to secret meetings, we should genuinely feel sorry for them… and if they don’t repent, pray them right out of the church.

Finally, secret meetings consist of ecclesiastical vigilantes.

These people ignore the teachings of Scripture on reconciliation… bypass due process as outlined in church bylaws… and decide to take matters into their own hands. Their group alone knows what’s best for the church!

That particular group of vigilantes couldn’t make a go of their new church. They found attracting newcomers was hard going, although I have a feeling that they never figured out why. Their church eventually disbanded.

And you know what was ironic? When two of the people in that group died, I was asked to conduct their funerals.

I assumed that everyone in that group hated me, but they didn’t. Only a couple of people in that group really hated me.

It’s been 25 years since that secret meeting took place. I’ve learned a lot since then about healthy and unhealthy behavior among Christians.

And one of the things I’ve learned is that many of the secrets that arise out of secret meetings eventually become known. Nothing stays hidden forever.

And yet tonight… all over this land… Christians will be holding secret meetings… most of them aimed at their pastor.

To quote from an old folk song, “When will they ever learn?”

 

I strongly urge every church leadership body—no matter what your particular polity may call such a body—to never, ever meet in secret. The love bond of the Lord Jesus Christ should allow you to handle 99.44% of all matters in full transparency.

On the extremely rare occasion where the absolute confidentiality involving a matter where it is necessary to protect a member of the congregation from harm, then, and only then, should the leadership meet in secret. However, the leadership should never meet in secret regarding members of the professional staff or support staff of the church. It should never meet in secret to resolve a conflict within the leadership. Nor should it meet in secret to avoid following Matthew 18:15-17.

Rather, every matter regarding the leadership or the staff should be discussed with full transparency in accord with Matthew 18 and resolved accordingly. Every matter of strategy and long-range planning should be dealt with transparently.

The leadership cannot become a servant of the Body of Christ when it meets in secret. Meeting in secret tends to breed an attitude of “it’s us against them.” There is no place for such thinking in the Kingdom of God.

______________________

1 http://blog.restoringkingdombuilders.org/2013/08/14/the-foolishness-of-secret-meetings/
2 Steinke, Peter L. Healthy Congregations: A Systems Approach. Herndon, VA: The Alban Institute, 2006.

 

Copyright © 2014 by Dean K. Wilson. All Rights Reserved.